Men In Skirts

Why all the fuss about boys in skirts? Men have always worn them.
The stirrer takes an irreverent look.

Historically, skirts for men are the norm and trousers the aberration. In Ancient Egypt all the men wore skirts. Their civilisation lasted from 3100BC till 30BC – till they were swept away by the ultra-butch macho men of the Roman Empire (trousers optional).

A mere 1500 years and the empire was gone. Even butching up the skirts with leather couldn’t stem the tide of history.

The Greeks, who also lost an empire to the Romans after thousands of years of civilisation, still have soldiers in skirts. Some people never learn.

Skirts are healthier and more practical than trousers for a military man, especially in hot climates. Take Polynesia, for example.

Even in cooler climates, freedom of movement (and freedom from time consuming buttons and zips) is preferred to the confining and binding constriction of pants.

Now, for those of you of a sensitive disposition, a warning. You are about to see a picture of some British schoolboys wearing skirts. Brace yourselves.

There, that wasn’t so bad, was it? Nobody told these boys to wear skirts: they demanded to. Why broil in trousers during a heatwave, when they could have a nice cooling breeze instead? Like these French bus drivers in Nantes.

I can see an argument for keeping boys in trousers (preferably long trousers) if they happen to attend a school run by celibate religious men. It would give them an extra margin of safety. But surely the proper answer is not to ban schoolboys from wearing frocks and skirts, but to send them to safer schools?

Finally, modern men are allowed to wear frocks. Provided they have impeccable macho credentials. Like footy players, who are clearly immensely relieved to abandon those ultra-tight shorts at the end of every season.

Make the most of it lads. Once it’s OK for gay players to come out, you probably won’t do this any more. So enjoy it while you can.

About the author

Veteran gay writer and speaker, Doug was one of the founders of the UKs pioneering GLBTI newspaper Gay News (1972) , and of the second, Gay Week, and is a former Features Editor of Him International. He presented news and current affairs on JOY 94.9 FM Melbourne for more than ten years. "Doug is revered, feared and reviled in equal quantities, at times dividing people with his journalistic wrath. Yet there is no doubt this grandpa-esque bear keeps everyone abreast of anything and everything LGBT across the globe." (Daniel Witthaus, "Beyond Priscilla", Clouds of Magellan, Melbourne, 2014)