Freshly Doug Thursday

Dave Gough

It’s love in the tropics. Rumours that Clive Palmer and Bob Katter have kissed and made up, and may get into bed together to form a pro-mining political party. Will they try to recruit Gina Rinehart to het it up a bit? Watch this space.

If they need a sports minister, may I recommend flying this bloke out from Newcastle in the UK. Because Australian sport could really use an honest outspoken homophobe to replace all the mealy-mouthed boys paying lip service to ‘diversity’ while doing jack shit about it.

We have dicked around with this one for years, and we are no further forward. The bottom line, guys (stop sniggering Akka), is that until you come out, sport will stay homophobic and unsafe for LGBTI in the rooms, on the field, at school and at the grounds. So stop being such a bunch of wusses and get on with it.

Everyone knows there are more professional openings for ambitious queerocrats in the US than here. Despite a flurry of rumours last week, Victorian Health Minister David Davis has still not announced his lineup for the GLBTI Ministerial Advisory Committee (though to judge by the surge in interest in my LinkedIn profile, I may still be in with a chance).

Over There, however, there are career opportunities:Hilary Clinton is addressing US State Department LGBT staff members as I type, while the CIA is actively recruiting us. If Hils wasn’t leaving I might be tempted to pop across and offer my services.

The story of how the New York Times overcame its own homophobia is also the story of how the US came out of the darkness of the Reagan years, when AIDS was never mentioned, to the day when a sitting President endorsed equal marriage.

Odd goings on in Uganda: yesterday the Speaker, who has been promising the Kill Gays Bill as a “Christmas present” to the people, suddenly went AWOL yesterday in the midst of a debate over oil, shutting down the sitting and throwing parliament into chaos. Meanwhile it appears that despite earlier rumours to the contrary, the death penalty will still be in the bill when it comes to the house for the vote.

Petitions are still circulating to try to get this heinous bill spiked: one of the most successful in terms of numbers, with almost half a million signatures, is one calling for the two major western banks there, Barclays and Citibank, to use their influence to stop it.

The closer we get to equality, the more desperate and extreme our opponents become, and in the process reveal themselves as the ridiculous clowns they are. Watch Jim Wallace pick this one up: French psychiatrist says gay parents will breed up a generation of terrorists. Reporting stories like this, I could almost wish that were true.

Delta Goodrem, Anthony Callea, Tina Arena, Jake Shears, Heather Small and Megan Mulally will all help Mardi Gras celebrate this years theme Generations of Love. Well, some of them, anyway. The more recent ones.

Looking forward to seeing the LGBTI Health Alliance board doing the Zimmer-frame dance from The Producers down Oxford Street, led by Mark Butler pushing Bert Newton in a wheelchair.

Well, a man can dream . . . . .

About the author

Veteran gay writer and speaker, Doug was one of the founders of the UKs pioneering GLBTI newspaper Gay News (1972) , and of the second, Gay Week, and is a former Features Editor of Him International. He presented news and current affairs on JOY 94.9 FM Melbourne for more than ten years. "Doug is revered, feared and reviled in equal quantities, at times dividing people with his journalistic wrath. Yet there is no doubt this grandpa-esque bear keeps everyone abreast of anything and everything LGBT across the globe." (Daniel Witthaus, "Beyond Priscilla", Clouds of Magellan, Melbourne, 2014)